I try to be as honest about shit as possible. [ which he says, but then he's just sort of staring into his coffee, too, when she says that. ]
...I'm letting her decide for us. It's the only thing that feels right to me. [ there's a little flicker in his emotions that's akin to something like desperation before it fizzles out almost immediately. ] I want her to decide what's next for us and...whatever that is I'm going to be with her for pretty much the rest of my life.
Good. You're a good guy. And you're a good guy for her. I guess...I don't even know what "keeping an eye out for her" even means, cuz like, it's not like she needs a bodyguard. But if this is it, no contact ever again, then just knowing she's got someone who has her back would make me feel a lot better.
...at home? For me, you mean? First up, definitely solving the problem that is my ex-boss. And then... [ she sighs heavily ] ...trying to fix my own mess, I guess.
[ there's a soft huff at that, and he finally pulls his cup closer. ]
No, I get it. I'd probably say the same if we weren't from the same place, or if we were going separately. She's...more than capable of taking care of herself, but she kind of just makes you want to try and take care of her anyway. I don't know. She's...really important to me. So I'm not gonna let anything happen to her. At least not until we can maybe contact people we've met here or find a way to see other people again.
[ there's a low hum though. ]
...it's a hard thing to do. Fixing things that seem too messy to fix. I get that it's a weird thing to say, but I kind of hope being here maybe helped you think of options for how to change things.
[ she smiles just a little ] You know, you can just say it. You don't have to tiptoe around saying "how important she is to you."
[ then, sobering again with a sip of her coffee ]
Well, I'm definitely not gonna murder my way out of my problems. And the only other thing I learned here was "apologize more," which...I don't know, I might have messed up bad enough that that won't be enough.
I don't think anybody needs to hear how much I actually love her, but sure. Duly noted.
[ but the topic at hand. ]
No, definitely don't murder your way out of your problems. But you know. Survival skills from all of our missions and shit. [ ... ] What makes you think you messed up bad enough that an apology won't be enough though?
He's...half-ghost. It's a thing. And he looks different when he's a ghost. I didn't know it until...well, here, basically.
And I don't know what was up with him and that dog when they ruined my life, but...knowing him as a person, I know he wouldn't have done that to me on purpose.
Ghost transformation. Okay, yeah, I can see how that might get confusing. [ ...but he hums in thought. ] I can see how apologizing might not feel like enough. Do you...I mean, it sounds like a person you maybe recognize if you want to actually apologize. Have you guys spoken much as, uh, people?
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...I'm letting her decide for us. It's the only thing that feels right to me. [ there's a little flicker in his emotions that's akin to something like desperation before it fizzles out almost immediately. ] I want her to decide what's next for us and...whatever that is I'm going to be with her for pretty much the rest of my life.
[ that said: ]
What's next at home?
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Good. You're a good guy. And you're a good guy for her. I guess...I don't even know what "keeping an eye out for her" even means, cuz like, it's not like she needs a bodyguard. But if this is it, no contact ever again, then just knowing she's got someone who has her back would make me feel a lot better.
...at home? For me, you mean? First up, definitely solving the problem that is my ex-boss. And then... [ she sighs heavily ] ...trying to fix my own mess, I guess.
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No, I get it. I'd probably say the same if we weren't from the same place, or if we were going separately. She's...more than capable of taking care of herself, but she kind of just makes you want to try and take care of her anyway. I don't know. She's...really important to me. So I'm not gonna let anything happen to her. At least not until we can maybe contact people we've met here or find a way to see other people again.
[ there's a low hum though. ]
...it's a hard thing to do. Fixing things that seem too messy to fix. I get that it's a weird thing to say, but I kind of hope being here maybe helped you think of options for how to change things.
no subject
[ then, sobering again with a sip of her coffee ]
Well, I'm definitely not gonna murder my way out of my problems. And the only other thing I learned here was "apologize more," which...I don't know, I might have messed up bad enough that that won't be enough.
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I don't think anybody needs to hear how much I actually love her, but sure. Duly noted.
[ but the topic at hand. ]
No, definitely don't murder your way out of your problems. But you know. Survival skills from all of our missions and shit. [ ... ] What makes you think you messed up bad enough that an apology won't be enough though?
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I already had plenty of survival skills from home. But...well, I spent two whole years basically trying to kill him.
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Okay. New question. How easy would it be to explain to this guy why you've been trying to kill him for two years?
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Okay. Well, I'm not him, but pretend I am for a moment. What would you say the reason was if you had to explain it to him?
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[ wow! saying it like that really makes her feel even worse about it!! ]
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So he looks like a ghost. But he's also a person? Who was involved and looked like he ruined your life but didn't. Did I get that right?
[ since he knows enough about val's lore to sort of cobble together a guess. ]
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And I don't know what was up with him and that dog when they ruined my life, but...knowing him as a person, I know he wouldn't have done that to me on purpose.
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Ghost transformation. Okay, yeah, I can see how that might get confusing. [ ...but he hums in thought. ] I can see how apologizing might not feel like enough. Do you...I mean, it sounds like a person you maybe recognize if you want to actually apologize. Have you guys spoken much as, uh, people?